Do not fall back in
Going strong, but you can’t rely on that forever. You must always stay on your toes and check that your mindset is ok.
What is going well, what could go better
I’m really pushing this idea of second guessing if I’m going to be truly free of this in the long-term future.
Vaping is still not helping my mindset, and it has many of the same problems that porn use entails, to be honest. I need to quit this habit. It’s like a crutch. The sleep disruption is bad, and a mindset creeps in ‘if i’m not looking after myself here, why bother looking after myself in other areas’.
I write that while there’s a vape in front of me on the desk. t-t
Pornography will always negatively affect my soul
It doesn’t really matter what justification I ever give the act of using PMO. It’s self harm to my soul. It damages my self esteem. It makes me interact with other people worse. It removes the pleasure I recieve from everyday living.
There is a wonderful zest and vigour to living life normally, without the affliction of a pornography addiction. Falling just making the same mistakes repeatedly, forever, until the day I die.
I don’t want to be back here writing some bullshit about how I have failed
This blog has an expiry date. I will quit pornography and eradicate it from my life. I do not want it there any more.
I need to do the laundry every day. Second guess myself. Am I really living the porn-free ideal lifestyle that I have architected for myself? That’s what is most important on some level. These are deep goals.
Bring back porn-free 2024.