We don't mess up

You do the bad things, and you feel bad. No surprises. We don’t do the bad things, we don’t feel bad. We feel good.

There’s no point in continuing to do something you have rationally assessed as a net negative in your life.

Where are all these views coming from?

I feel like this site got like 1.5k views in a week or something. It’s spiking in an interesting way. Say hi.

Artificial pleasures tend to ruin your mood in the long term

I cannot begin to tell you how much mental clarity I felt last time before I watched porn and went into the dark tunnel for a bit. It’s tragic. To top it off, I got through three SKE Crystal Bar vapes this week. Vaping also doesn’t help honestly.

I do realise though, vape is a drop in the bucket compared to the horrificness that pornography brings into my life. I make poor decisions, I don’t think about my long term goals in the way I should. I lose vision of my life. I’m definitely struggling with lack of ambition in many ways.

Beginning to enjoy the pleasure that is already there, in front of me every day without the need to resort to artificial stimulation or chemicals will go a long way in improving my mood in the long term. Source: me when I tried this

It’s like a weaning off process. I’ve been used to a certain way of thinking for a very long time, nearly half of my life. Always resorting to some sort of pacifier, or something that fucks with your head.

The programming analogy

When I’m programming, I don’t tolerate bugs in my software. I try to understand how to debug the code in an effective way, to fix it so that it doesn’t happen again. These bugs in the software are often devastating to the operation of the program.

At the end of the day though, it’s just a program. I’m not really attached to it a lot of the time. I do my time at work, and I try to get a good finished product.

You are deeply attached to your own software though

It’s a night and day difference between someone who looks after themselves and someone who doesn’t. Not blasting yourself full of sexual material our brain was never designed to handle goes a long way in looking after yourself.

It’s like having well working, functioning software.

Disgusting colours

This is a disgusting color. There’s a deep mental association between this color and depressing, long internet sessions with nothing to show for it at the end except regret, lower self esteem and further disconnection from reality and good choices.

I’m taking this the most seriously I have ever taken it in my life. I don’t give a fuck. I’m not watching that shit. I’m tired of writing this website.

Well. I like writing this website. Why do I like doing it? I feel the more I write and get my thoughts out onto the internet in this way, a semi-produced way, the higher chance I have of beating this shit once and for all. And maybe you are beginning to get the impression I’d like that quite nicely.

Muh ‘you’re thinking about this too much go outside’

I don’t give a fuck. My dick doesn’t work correctly. I feel low energy. I feel hard cognitive dissonance. I feel immense regret at the opportunities I have passed up, often due to porn in some way.

Missed opportunities

And that’s not even mentioning all of the psychological enjoyment and wellbeing I have thrown in the bin over the years because I think that quitting porn isn’t important enough.

Porn-free 2024 and beyond

Some say it takes 2 years to fully heal a porn addict’s brain. I wouldn’t be surprised considering I started when I was 12.

I can’t begin to fathom how good I will feel approaching that goal. Every day I’m getting stronger, feeling better and better.

Short term ‘dopamine fixes’ aren’t really all that it’s cracked up to be. They often leave you feeling very lousy. And porn is the worst one there is:

It feels comparatively far easier to get bored of video games or drugs by comparision. The barrier to entry is higher for those things too. Porn is serious shit, the worst of the worst.

Never give in.